My husband loves me but not sexually, what should I do? Here is what you need to know.
Sexual attraction and compatibility is a very vital tool that keeps the spark in every marriage alive.
At the beginning of marriage, sex is always fun, unplanned, and exciting.
However, things may change when the couple begins to grow fond of each other.
Having sex might be quite stressful due to a busy schedule, life activities, or stress.
Nevertheless, when you begin to notice that your husband loves you but is not sexually attracted to you any longer then you shouldn’t treat it with levity.
There are various possibilities that could be responsible for this act.
It could range from a personal struggle to some sort of emotional garbage that you both are going through.
Regardless of the reason, things can always get better and your sex life can be restored to how it used to be before.
That’s why we’ve highlighted potential reasons why your husband is not sexually attracted to you.
After showing you these signs, you’ll also see the practical solutions on how you can make your husband gain sexual interest in you once again.
Trust me; this is something you want to read till the end.
Why Your Husband Loves You But Not Sexually
1. Physical Health Issues
Sometimes the reason why your husband loves you but is not sexually attracted to you might be because he’s struggling with some sort of health condition which in turn weakens his desire for sex.
Conditions like heart disease, obesity, diabetes, or hormonal imbalance can lead to him having little or low libido.
What To Do
If you notice that your husband has been battling with some sort of health-related disease then you should strengthen him by not talking down or insulting his condition then.
Have an open conversation with him and also seek medical and professional help to make things better.
2. Emotional And Mental Stress
As humans when we go through some level of stress be it physical, emotional, or mental it tends to affect our sex drive.
And that may be the case with your husband; he doesn’t just seem to be sexually attracted to you no matter how much you turn him on.
Check him out he may be going through some sort of physical and mental stress.
Maybe he is stressed at work, or he has been racking his brain recently which leads to mental exhaustion.
Mental and emotional health has a huge part to play when it comes to our sex life.
What To Do
Try to talk to him and see how you can be of help; a lot of time, men tend to allow themselves to get so exhausted before they create time for rest.
So, you can try allowing him to take a break from whatever is bothering him and shower him with love, attention, and care.
3. Age And Hormonal Imbalance
As men grow older they go through hormonal imbalances which may affect their sex life.
Reduced testosterone levels may result in low libido. This is normal.
What To Do
You’ll have you first recognize that aging can come with a lot of hormonal imbalance.
So you both should look for remedies and practical solutions to making sex happen.
4. Fear Of Performance Anxiety
Another reason why your husband is not sexually attracted to you may be because he is anxious about his performance in the bedroom.
Your husband may be worried about satisfying your expectations and meeting your demands so he’ll rather shut the door of sex entirely.
What To Do
It is normal to have that fear because men love to be in charge in the bedroom.
They also want to satisfy their wives to the maximum so if anything lesser than this happens it may weaken their excitement for sex.
Have a non-judgemental conversation with him about how you feel about his performance.
If you need him to do more let him know and you can as well try new styles and ways that will be pleasurable for you both.
5. Lack Of Emotional Connection
Trust me, sex starts outside the bedroom before it proceeds to the bedroom.
Your husband may shower you with all forms of affection and you think he loves you while he is not emotionally attracted to you.
He may feel misunderstood or emotionally distant from you so it might be difficult to make sexual advances because you both have become merely roommates.
He hasn’t stopped loving you; he just can’t find that emotional connection between you both again.
What To Do
Start by building your sexual life outside the bedroom, you both should engage in activities that make you bond.
Build the friendship back, do the chores together, and talk and communicate about your activities as well.
6. He Could Be Cheating
This may sound harsh but yes, your husband may be cheating and that’s why he’s isn’t sexually attracted to you as he used to before.
Truth is, every man will crave sex from the woman he loves, so if he showers you with love yet doesn’t want to have sex with you then, he may be getting it from someone else.
Yes, he still adores you and treats you with so much respect but when it comes to sex he shies away from it.
However, before you come to this conclusion you have to be sure of your facts and evidence.
What To Do
When you notice that your husband begins to shy away from sex and you suspect that he is cheating then speak to him about it.
Do your research to know the next line of action.
You’ll have to ask yourself why you think your husband who loves you so much would cheat on you.
Draw out your evidence and write down everything that you’re thinking or feeling.
Doing this will make you understand the situation better.
7. He Is Depressed
The effects of depression may weigh down the sex life of a man.
This is because the neurotransmitters produced in the brain communicate with our sex organs.
Depression causes unexcited marriage, low energy, constant mood swings, fatigue, and hopelessness which may in turn take a toll on the sexual life of your husband.
So, who knows, your husband might just be depressed.
What To Do
Knowing that your husband has fallen into depression is one challenging place to be because you’re meant to be his confidence and friend.
Nevertheless, it is important that you call his awareness to the changes that you’ve noticed over time. Ask him what the cause of depression is all about.
If you need to see a therapist or doctor together then do so and make him use any recommended drugs given to him.
8. Sex Is Now A Routine So It Seems Boring
The older some couples get the more they begin to wane from sex.
And apart from being together for long, you both have become so fond of each other that sex is now a usual routine in which you both partake.
This may make your husband gradually lose interest in sex. Familiarity in marriage can lead to a boring or sexless sexual life between couples.
Moreover, your husband may be too consumed with the day-to-day intimacy that you both share that he begins to see sex as needless in the marriage.
What To Do
It is very normal for your husband to feel this way after some years or months in marriage so speaking up about it will help.
Tell him that you both can always ignite your sexual life back to how it used to be.
So, spice it up, share your desires, and interests, also create time in between the day to have sex different from the regular time you both have it together.
Just make your sexual life fun.
9. He Wants You To Initiate Sex
Another reason why your husband loves you but not sexually is because he wants you to initiate sex.
Men don’t like it when they are the ones bringing up the idea of sex all the time.
If he is the only one initiating sex then there is a high tendency to get rejected at some time and this may make him shun away from it because of the fear of rejection.
What To Do
As a wife, you may not always like the idea of initiating sex.
But listen, times have changed and you can bring up the idea of sex in your marriage.
Make sure to turn him on when he least expects or plan date nights.
It may be difficult to navigate times like this when your husband has little or no desire to have sex with you.
Even if he treats you well and lovely, that space will always be there.
So, it is left to you to start up a serious conversation with him about how you feel and what you both can do to make things better.
If after doing this, you still don’t see any positive result then you might have to seek help from a professional.
Maybe a therapist, marriage counselor, or even a doctor.
This will surely help.
I wish you bliss in your marriage.