There are a lot of red flags not to ignore when dating someone new.
Every relationship comes with a euphoria of joy and happiness.
Everything just seems to be going great and fine that you can’t just imagine your partner exhibiting some not-so-good character which may be harmful to you or the relationship at large.
Nevertheless, there are visible red flags that shouldn’t be ignored when dating some irrespective of how much you love or adore them.
This is because accepting and looking away from the negative indicators may leave you in shackles.
In this article, we will be highlighting red flags that shouldn’t be ignored in every new relationship.
And if you’ve already found yourself in a relationship that makes you a shadow of yourself then this article is as well best for you.
What Are Red Flags?
Red flags are usually symbols to warn or command you to stop because of the danger ahead.
Red flags relating to relationships are those things that are not too right about your partner which in turn could endanger your physical, emotional, or mental wellbeing.
When you see signs of red flags in a person, that simply means that the person probably cannot have or maintain a healthy romantic relationship with the opposite sex.
Red flags are potential signposts of a toxic relationship and once you notice any of these signs you should never sweep them under the rug.
Below are 10 Red Flags Not To Ignore When Dating Someone New
10 Red Flags Not To Ignore When Dating Someone New
1. Love Bombing
Love bombing usually happens when the person you’re dating excessively showers you with a lot of romance, gifts, affection, and attention even if they just met you new.
Most of the time partners who show signs of love bombing have a way of manipulating and making you want to stay in that relationship no matter the level of negativity that they portray.
They may begin to send flowers, gifts, money, or offer to pay for vacations. This isn’t bad in itself, but you should ask yourself why your new partner is doing all this.
The most obvious sign of love bombing is when your partner fails to pay attention to your emotional needs rather love bombs you in the way they feel is best for them.
This is a sign of danger, you should run.
2. Stories Of Crazy Ex’s
Talking negatively about their ex and painting them bad on the first date is a huge red flag and you need to know that you aren’t meant to be with them.
I was once in the talking stage with a guy who narrated the negativity of all his exes to me within a week of our meeting.
I just knew right away that it was a huge red flag for me.
Although not all people will remain friends with their ex, nevertheless, you shouldn’t spill the negative side of your ex to your new partner.
It’s a sign that you disrespect your ex.
The reason they do this is to act like the victim just so you can feel for them. This is sort of a psychological trap to get you.
3. Controlling Behavior And Jealousy
Getting into a new relationship can be so alluring that you may take every opinion your new partner tells you.
But in between you should know when they are trying to force you to act upon every decision they intend for you.
This is a great sign of controlling behavior, and it is a huge red flag that you should run from.
Partners like this couple have their controlling behavior with jealousy and trust me, this is a narcissistic behavior so you shouldn’t remain there otherwise, it’ll become so toxic.
This may occur in instances like wanting to know the exact thing you’re doing at every point in time or demanding an explanation for every action that you take.
They may also isolate you from your family and friends because they feel like they have total control over you. This is a result of insecurity from their path which may be harmful to your mental and emotional health.
4. Inconsistent Communication
Inconsistent communication is one of the red flags not to ignore when dating someone new.
They are always calming busy and unavailable to talk or communicate.
The fact has it that constant communication and expression of emotion is one of the vital things that keeps a relationship going.
But if your new lover always seeks an excuse not to engage you in communication or they are inconsistent with it then it may be that they’re not really interested in you.
If they truly love you then they’ll make time to communicate with you irrespective of their busy schedule.
Another red flag is when they are inconsistent with their communication.
Today they are in your DM flooding you with loads of messages and suddenly, they go off for days without reaching out to you.
And when they do it looks like they weren’t unavailable all these while.
This is a huge red flag you should never overlook.
5. It’s Complicated From The Beginning
The relationship themselves may come with a lot of complications especially if there is a gap in communication or understanding.
But a new relationship shouldn’t experience complications from the start. This might just be a red flag you need to see.
The cause of complication sometimes may be a result of some realities from you or your partner’s life, they may have a not-so-good past, a child from the ex, or something that doesn’t sound nice.
Nevertheless, you should be able to make independent decisions and not leave yourself in confusion about what to do about the whole situation.
If you find yourself in a condition like this then it is best to walk away.
6. Constant Mood Swing
Being with someone who has constant mood swings and has no control over how they feel and react may be the worst nightmare you’ll have to through.
You need to stay clear of someone who has extreme mood swings because they will make a mess of your emotions.
This may make you deal with a lot of emotional instability which will put your mental health in danger.
This minute they are happy and smiling with you and the next minute they just want it to be all alone by themselves.
As much as mood swings are normal in humans, they shouldn’t be regular and constant because it’s a great sign of psychological imbalance.
And if he or she gets angry constantly at the beginning of the relationship then you should be ready to be a partaker of their anger issues someday because they may spill it all at you.
7. Not Generous And Inability To Compromise
Generosity takes various forms in a new relationship, sometimes, it is most likely to be monetary.
Various form of generosity is time, resource, affection, and gifts.
Stinginess is not a good quality that partners should have when dealing with each other.
While generosity shouldn’t be expected by everyone, your new partner should be someone who can always be generous to you with everything within their reach in as much as it makes you happy.
Another red flag is the inability to comprise.
When one is unable to comprise then it might be quite difficult to be generous because sometimes generosity means that you compromise on the things that you find comfortable for yourself
If you notice that your new partner doesn’t want to go out of his or her way to make sure that the relationship is in good condition then accept it as an indicator of a red flag.
8. Treats Other Poorly
No matter the level of love and affection your partner showers you with, if they treat other people with little or no respect then you should be ready to be acted upon like that someday.
A good partner will treat people with respect and honor irrespective of their status quo.
So, how does your partner treat his domestic workers or people around him?
If your partner always acts rude or unconsidered about the needs of people close to them then be ready to receive your share someday.
9. Chronic Infidelity
No level of mutual love or affection should make you consider an infidel as a partner.
This is because you have the free will and freedom to change the hands of the clock while in a relationship.
One of the ways you can do this is by walking out of a relationship in which your partner cheats.
The truth is sometimes, you cannot change your partner’s character no matter the level of endurance or tolerance you seem to have.
It’s simply in them.
If you’ve once been in a relationship with a cheat then you won’t do yourself more harm by wanting to stay with a partner who shows infidelity
Infidelity comes with a lot of vices like lying and covering up for wrong.
You don’t want to engage yourself with someone who is like this.
10. Treating Themselves Poorly
Some partners don’t just treat people around them poorly, but they also treat themselves poorly.
They are always found pitying themselves or blaming people for every negative thing that happens around them thereby refusing to take responsibility for their actions.
If you are with a partner like this then you should know that this is a red flag and there is danger ahead.
When your partner is self-destructive there’s no way they will take care of you.
They should be able to take care of themselves, their belongings and rise to responsibility for their life.
Doing this will make them treat you with love and respect because loving others starts from loving yourself and taking responsibility for your actions.
If you ignore red flags when dating someone new then be ready to keep up with it forever.
Sometimes, red flags are so glaring in a relationship.
But somehow, we find ourselves lingering back and not walking away because of the love, affection, commitment, or resources that have gone into that relationship.
Listen, no relationship is meant to make you a shadow of yourself, and your partner is meant to make you better and not bitter.
But, if you intentionally ignore the red flag then you’re doing yourself more harm.
Reflect on these red flags and see the one that resonates with your new partner.